The legal drinking age ..

The legal minimum drinking age used to vary state to state until nineteen years ago when Congress passed the National Minimum Drinking Age Act of 1984 (Title 23 U.S.C. §158).  This law essentially told the individual states that if they wanted to continue receiving federal funding for roads and transportation they would raise their legal age to 21.  Initially there were some states that resisted but by 1988 all had complied. 

There were numerous reason this measure was pushed but the most prominent were the amount of late night traffic accidents involving alcohol.  Supposedly upon reaching the age of 21 people were more mature and were less likely to drive drunk.  Over the years there have been a myriad of studies published, and national groups formed all in support of this action. Whether or not it has actually help curb accidents or alcohol related crimes, I highly doubt.

The law also has its oppositions, the most reasonable argument being our armed forces.  If someone is old enough to enlist in our military, kill and possibly die in the defense of our country they should be able to legally drink any where in the country.  I completely agree with this sentiment.  I don't agree that you can label maturity with a numerological age.  As I have said a million times, my 17 year old son is far more mature than a good amount of my customer base.  Let's be honest, once alcohol is involved you should just cut people's general IQ in half.

After the absolutely ridiculous night we had at work tonight I've come up with a better idea than setting the age minimum to 21.

First, let me take a minute to thank the socially inept mental midgets that caused the large fight tonight and in turn gave me the inspiration for this post.  An extra special thank you to the girl who attempted to hit me, it was my pleasure to introduce your face to the wall.  I hope you will be life long friends.

Anyway, I think you should have to have a license to drink, sort of a like driver's license. First you get a permit, this permit allows you to go into bars and buy alcohol with the supervision of a licensed person.  The purpose for this being hands on practice for the testing.  It would be required that you be a permit holder for a minimum of 6 months before being allowed to test for your license and if you have any indiscretions in that time frame  your permit is revoked and you are automatically disqualified from reapplying for a year.

Once the minimum permit time has been met there would be a series of tests that you must submit to in various stages of intoxication.  These tests would include things such as, IQ, general disposition, problem solving and how you respond to different forms of emotional/physical stimulation.  If you fail any of the above you would be reissued a permit and would repeat the original process.

Upon passing the tests you would receive your license which would be based on a point system just like a drivers license.  Point values would be assigned to a list of incidents such as acts of violence or driving while intoxicated.  If or when you are involved in an incidents points would be removed from your total point pool. If your point pool reaches zero your license would be revoked for the minimum of a year (possibly more depending on the severity of your actions), you would lose the ability to purchase alcohol during that time and you would be required to attend alcohol responsibility classes.

Obviously there would be a lot more involved than what I've listed here but I just wanted to paint the picture.  I think I should run for office....

Moral of the story: Age does not dictate maturity levels and not everyone should be allowed to drink upon reaching the age of 21.  Certain people should never be allowed to. Maybe I should turn my place into a private club and just make this a membership rule.  Anything to keep these fucktards out of my bar!